~The Story of how I Learned to Channel~
Let me preface this, with giving you my reason for sharing my personal story. I was unsure of just how much of my own personal struggles, feelings and fears that I felt comfortable sharing. I have decided to share with you my heart and soul in this detailed personal story of my own journey; It was a path of struggle, fear, faith and finally peace. My hope is that it helps others who are searching to find their own inner guidance and by hearing another’s story you may be able to relate…
The very first time I ever remember hearing the Angel's I was 5 years old. It was early in the morning and my mother had come into my bedroom. As she sat on the edge of my bed, together we heard the most beautiful music begin to play. It was relatively loud and I jumped out of bed and peered out of my window, expecting to see who was playing this beautiful music. Much to my dismay there was no one there. My mother, looking quite puzzled herself could hear the music but no one else was home; it was much too loud to be coming from another home. The music was soft and peaceful yet quite loud. There were harps, violins, and a choir singing with the most beautiful voices I had ever heard. As the song came to its end, the music softened and eventually faded until it was no longer audible. Even though I was only 5, I simply just knew that it was the Angels who had let us gain a glimpse, if only for a few moments of what "Heaven" sounded like. The memory will remain with my mother and I for the rest of our lives. Even though I thought about that experience every once in a while, I never heard the Angel's sing again. That was the last I had "heard" from my Angel's until over 20 years later....
Life went on, and I focused on growing up. My mother and I had never told anyone about our unusual experience. It’s not that we intended to keep it a secret; we just simply kept the memory of the blissful experience to ourselves. Although it was never brought up, that event would prove to be a very influential experience in years to come. My mother had focused all of her attention on helping my younger sister and I to grow up and go off to college. After high school, I went off to college and was determined to find success within the corporate world. I studied business and economics and upon graduation I then began my search for the career that would ensure that I had all the success one could possibly dream of. I watched as my mother single handedly raised my sister and I. Although she never complained, I know now just how difficult it must have been to provide for two children all by herself. It was a situation that I swore to never endure myself and it was etched in my brain from a very young age that I wanted to make as much money as I could to ensure I never had to settle for not having enough. I always had huge dreams and although I really never knew where to look, I always had a burning desire to find what I was searching for. At the time I was sure that the very thing I was searching for could be found in financial success. But with each milestone that I had achieved, I was soon met with the very same emptiness and an unquenchable thirst for something more.
Now I should have told you that we were raised with absolutely no focus on "spiritual" learning. We believed strongly in God, but as for talking to Angels, following our inner guidance and learning that your outer world is only a reflection of your inner world; that was to come much later. It was something I knew very little about, and it certainly was the furthest thing from my mind as I chased my so called dream of becoming successful. In my search, I had stumbled upon a book called "the Secret" and it left me speechless. I couldn't believe that my thoughts were responsible for the experiences in my life. This new knowledge that I had just gained, only left me with even more questions. I tried to use this information to my advantage and create an even bigger dream, one which I would be able to attract even more abundance into my life. However I had very little knowledge at that time of how the law of attraction really worked, or that my beliefs were actually what was responsible for creating my reality.
As the months went on I continued to look for books that would lead me to more answers. However I was still heading down a path that was incredibly focused on material abundance with very little attention on my spiritual expansion. I was heavily focused on creating the life of my dreams and “having it all”. I traded on the stock market and was happy to work from home. Life was good, but it still felt shallow, it felt empty. Certainly I had expected that once I had obtained a more comfortable existence that I would have nothing else left to stress about. But as I found out, that wasn't the case. The very thought of losing what I had worked so hard to gain scared me more than the very drive I had to obtain it. Well as life would have it, the market came crashing down and the money and "success" that I had fought to obtain evaporated before my very eyes, it only took a matter of minutes, 15 to be exact before all was lost. At the time, the event brought me to my knees. I felt lost, broken, and completely alone. I didn't have a plan "B". All of my eggs were in one basket and that basket had just been smashed to smithereens.
As I reflect back at that very painful time, I now realize that it was the best thing that could have happened to me in my young life. Often times we need events that are so life altering to really make us stop and think. I was heading down a path that would only lead to more of the same. Even though I continued to set bigger goals for myself, every time I would achieve them I would quickly learn that I still couldn't fill the void that I felt deep down. I very much felt like I was back at square one as I found myself often searching for more information that could possibly help me to understand what went wrong. I knew on some level that I created this event, although at the time I certainly had no idea just how much of the event was created by the very thoughts, beliefs and fears I held.
I began devouring as much "spiritual information" as I possibly could get my hands on. It was like following a trail of cookie crumbs; one book lead to another which lead to a website which lead me to even more information. This went on for months. I buried myself in "piles" of information. Beliefs that I had held my entire life were being shattered left and right. I felt as though my whole world was built on lies. And yet, I had begun to find what I was searching for. Surprisingly, it wasn't being found in the "success" of financial gain. I was discovering the information that I had been yearning for my whole life. So many of the questions that I had growing up suddenly began to make more sense. I should also tell you that I have always had a profound love for animals. I have always considered them friends and equals, never possessions. I had always dreamed of being able to talk to animals and really hear what they had to say. I always knew they were capable of conscious thought, although I deemed it more of a fairy tale wish to one day talk to them…. That is until….
I was on a plane flying by myself from a business trip that I took to California. My flight was switched at the very last moment and I ended up on a small plane that was scheduled to make a stop before arriving to my destination. I walked through the isle scanning the seat numbers for my row. I came upon my seat and there sat a very cheerful chubby woman with strawberry blonde hair and very fair skin. I smiled politely and sat beside her. I wasn’t interested in having a conversation, I wanted to just read my book and get back home. This woman, who I now think of as an Angel had other plans. She began to ask polite questions about where I was from as she began to tell me that she was visiting the states for the summer; she lived in Australia. She told me upon take off that she had often imagined that Angels flew beside the plane every time she took off because she was a little frightened of flying. This peaked my interest, we hadn’t mentioned anything about Angels, spirituality, or anything other than pleasantries; yet this woman nonchalantly began talking about Angels. I put my book down and started to have a real conversation. What she told me next turned my whole world upside down.
She proceeded to tell me that she had just finished taking a class on animal communication. Of course I was interested but I was a bit hesitant at first. “They have classes on how to speak to animals?” She told me all about her class in her charming Australian accent. They brought in animals so the students could practice, and everyone was told to bring in a picture of their own animal or an animal they knew. The students began practicing speaking to the animals from just the pictures. The owners of the animals would confirm the answers they heard were correct right there on the spot! The short plane ride came to an end all too soon. My head was spinning from all the new thoughts I had.
I went home and went to the book store the very next morning. I went to the spiritual section and found that there were in fact books on how to communicate with animals! I was drawn to one book in particular and I picked it up and scrolled through it. I purchased it and began devouring it as soon as I returned home. How amazing this would be if I could actually hear my beloved Sophie, a beautiful, petite, incredibly poufy, Himalayan cat. She was a wonderful companion and my little friend but I never dreamed of just how insightful and wise she really was. I read the whole book in about 1 day and I immediately wanted to try to connect with Sophie. I got very quiet and as I sat on my bed with Sophie right beside me, I asked her quietly in my mind if she was willing to talk to me. I instantly heard yes, what took you so long!? I was shocked to say the least. Surely I had made that up! After a few questions which I heard quite easily, I began to think I may be just answering the questions in my mind because I knew her so well. I began to secretly practice with my best friends dog, a lab Shepard mix named Jax. I knew him well enough, but I didn’t know the answers to the questions I had asked him. I could easily confirm the answers by nonchalantly asking my best friend about his favorite toys, or what he did earlier that day, or what he ate. I was thrilled with each answer that I got that could be verified that I in fact heard him correctly.
I reluctantly told my husband about my experiences and although he was a bit shocked at first, he soon became my biggest fan. He was constantly asking me to talk to Sophie, I think it amazed him as much as it did me. I practiced regularly with my Sophie for the next 9 months. I would ask her to tell me where she was in the house that very moment so I could go and check, or if she had any food left. These are questions I couldn’t know the answer to regardless of how well I knew her. Of course she also shared her opinions, feelings and ideas as well. Sophie and I grew closer and closer each day. She amazed me at just how much she knew, what she was aware of, and her very opinionated nature. And so began my journey of learning to hear other beings.
As the months went on and I became confident in my ability to communicate with animals, I continued to read as much spiritual information as I could get my hands on. I was lead to a book that was completely channeled. It amazed me that I was reading the words of Angel's not just from a human being, but actual divine guidance. The book "Opening to channel" by Orin and Daben helped to unlock the other piece of the puzzle that changed my whole world. I was going to try to channel for myself….
I sat down and silently began to clear my mind. I was hesitant to say the least. This was different than talking to animals, as strange as that once seemed to me; I at least knew who I was talking to, the animals were sitting right in front of me. But this was different, I wasn't sure what to expect and I certainly didn’t know who I was going to talk to. I believed strongly that I had Angels; however at the time I was convinced that they couldn’t be bothered with trivial concerns of my day to day life. A million thoughts began to race through my mind. What would it feel like? What would I hear? Who would answer? However the experience I had when I was just 5 years old kept playing in the back of my mind. "They are there, they must be. I heard them then, why wouldn't I be able to hear them now?" I asked for the name of my guide. I simply heard the name Zachary. It came so clearly and easily, so I began asking other questions. My self-doubt quickly began to creep in, "it takes others years of practice to channel, how could I be able to do this on my first try?"
Zachary, who I now know as my guardian angel instructed me to go and get a journal and to write down each experience that I had when using my own intuition. I went out and purchased a journal that very day and began to use it immediately. I craved proof that I was hearing him correctly and accurately. I asked him something that I could easily validate almost every day for several months straight. I was amazed at the accuracy and certainly this journal did help me to begin to trust in my ability. However, I was incredibly worried about what others would think if they found out that I could hear Angels. This was not something that I had been accustomed to nor had I met anyone else that could channel. It was a strong belief of mine growing up that being “psychic” and “witchcraft” were closely related; a belief that strikes me as funny now. Yet at the time it was very real and I began to feel incredibly alone. I was drastically changing into someone else, but who?
I again reluctantly told my husband of my experiences. He was thrilled and embraced it immediately. I practiced regularly and he was quite pleased with the information that I suddenly could obtain. He would insist that I ask what the Angel's thought about seemingly everything. However this made me feel incredibly uncomfortable, "what if I was wrong? What if I was just making the answers up in my head?" After all, I wasn't hearing the Angel’s answers with my physical ears like I did when I was 5; their answers were heard with my spiritual ears. As months went by and my confidence slowly began to increase I was comfortable enough to tell a few people who were closest to me. Much to my surprise they were incredibly supportive and very eager to hear what the Angels had to say about their own topics of interest. I began slowly answering questions for just a few people who knew of this "secret ability" of mine, but I certainly wasn't ready to announce it to the world!
The Angels were incredibly patient and sent nothing but love and support. Each time I was overcome with self-doubt they encouraged me to continue. They never tired of sending me “proof” that I was in fact hearing them correctly. I began developing a close relationship with Zachary, much like you would a close friend. He encouraged me to trust in my ability and insisted that I was incredibly accurate, although I had a hard time accepting this at the time. Partly because I feared that it was my own mind just patting myself on the back, and partly because I still was overwhelmed at the thought of channeling for others. It was something that I certainly didn't take lightly and I focused intently on getting the clearest answers I could for them. To me, it felt like an awful lot of responsibility.
As time went on I began to develop my channeling abilities further and instead of just speaking to Zachary, I noticed that the energy began to change. They introduced themselves as the Angelic Realm and that they simply were a collective of which Zachary was a part. The Angels encouraged me to begin to branch out and start channeling for others. Although, I just wasn’t ready to take this on as a public service, it felt more personal to me at the time. I enjoyed my daily talks, and conversed with them like you would anyone else. In the beginning I often felt that because I wasn't able to channel like others that I had listened to, I found myself wishing I could channel like they did. Some would say that they simply got a feeling and felt the energy of those they were channeling, others were able to “step aside” and let the beings from the higher realms come in, which left them with little to no recollection of the conversation they had. I perceived this as being more advanced channeling at the time, not knowing that the way that you communicate with the higher realms is unique to you. The Angels patiently insisted that there was no “right” way to communicate; all that mattered is that you were able to accurately translate the energy which they sent.
As time went on, I began to truly appreciate the way that I was able to communicate with the Angels. I was able to remain fully conscious which allowed me to engage in full conversations and interact with them if I didn’t understand a concept that they shared with me. I felt most comfortable typing out the words as the Angels spoke, much like a scribe would. I hear them just as I would hear anyone else, although it is with my spiritual ears instead of my physical ears. As time went on I became more secure with my ability and worried less and less about what others would think of me “if they only knew”. I channeled regularly about every possible question I could think of. I kept a record of every answer they gave. Although I never felt pressured by the Angels, in time I began to realize that eventually I would feel comfortable enough to channel publicly. It was something that I could really see myself doing although I didn’t know when, but I just knew the day would come when I finally would be ready.
So here I sit, I now channel for others around the world and I have found it to be so enjoyable and gratifying that I wonder why I resisted for so long. I am finally at peace and no longer have that unquenchable thirst. I will be forever grateful for the Angels, animals, people and events in my life who helped me along this journey which has lead me to a place of solace. The path to gaining the trust in myself was winding, but I have truly found my calling and I feel so blessed to be able to share this gift with the world.