Me:Dear God, You there?
God: Must you still ask?
Me: Yes, maybe...even more so now.
Me: I guess because...I haven't come to you "asking" for anything since my Catholic school girl days. It's been years of "Gratitude calls." I don't know why it's hard for me to "call on you" when in need.
God: When I am most available; when I am listening most intently. When I am loving you more than you can ever know.
God: I don't think it is so much you are afraid to ask, to come to me as it is your fear of "needing." You have already concluded that your "lesson" in this moment is one of "surrender." You know the saying, "Let go and let God. Well, that is only somewhat true for you all need not "let go" before I "take over." I "take over" as that statement implies; I never let go. I do not need your "permission" to intervene. You are my child. I know what you need before you need it. I know what you will ask of me before you do. I am "on it" as they say before you experience it. No one knows her child like a mother. No one protects a child like his father. No child needs to ask for that.
So now I say to you...
Allow yourself to need; to need me and those who like me love you and receive joy in being there for you. Surrender to the process your soul has chosen to experience. "Remember" if you can that you agreed and chose all of this because you can do and handle it all. Whatever it may be, you meticulously planned every detail, even the simplest things like looking in the mirror and saying, "Wow! I look way better than I feel!" You've inserted those little "bread crumb" goodies as reminders. Pick up the crumb. Eat it. Savor it. All of them. They are just as fresh and delicious as the day you scattered them. Add some butter.
Me: I feel better. Thank you. I love you.
God: And I you...from the moment you were but a spark of Light by my side...