Seeing, Listening and Loving much better now.

In the past few months I have learned so much about myself. I feel like I have cleaned my slate. I feel like I have shed the stuff from my life that doesn’t matter anymore (or a little more); the stuff that is not of my vibration anymore. At first it was scary because I was so mind focused and I could analyze anything to death. I have always had a hard time feeling things too. My biggest was feeling loved. Not just from myself but from others too. I knew I was loved and am still. But it was so hard to feel it. I think my soul was so stuffed with the nonsense that the ego holds on to that I couldn’t feel it.

I really can’t explain how I shifted. It sort of slowly grows and is becoming stronger everyday but now that I am heart centered (or more often am heart centered)- I am seeing a whole new world!!! Everything around me is so alive and my body is so alive. I feel like I have not seen this world since I was a young girl. Everything around me has so much magic and life to it. For example, I was in the backyard having tea one morning and a crow landed on the back fence and I sat there looking at him--- then all of a sudden I started to SEE him. He wasn’t a “crow”. He was magical, he was beautiful, he was strength, he was love and he was divine. I looked at the trees and plants. And I could see them too! As I started to really see things again, a ton of emotion and energy surged through me (in a sort of overwhelming way). It was a huge rush that I hadn’t felt in a long time. I felt so alive. I could feel all of the love the trees, plants and birds were sending me. It was really quite overwhelming because it was just such a rush of emotion, but I totally embraced it. I just sat there receiving and giving. So after the rush came to a smooth flow I was really centered and so at peace. I started to hear some energies speaking to me. Instead of just hearing them, I was able to actually LISTEN to them. For the longest time I have only heard, but I haven’t actually listened. So this was pretty awesome. First the trees started to speak to me for a while so I listened to what they had to say and then I started to hear a beautiful little voice starting to speak to me and let me know some thing’s I needed to listen to and know. And I looked up and between some branches of the apple tree among all the beautiful pretty pink flowers was a sweet little faerie. It was such a wonderful moment. I sat and listened to her and sent her my love and when she flew behind a branch covered in flowers and then she was gone. I then sat for a few moments kind of taking it all in then got started on my day.

I find through out my days I have moments like this where I am seeing, and listening to my surroundings and I am totally one with everything around me. Then it kind of goes away again. But these are happening more and more now. I can feel Love from others and especially from myself all the time now. I can’t even explain how super stoked I am at this. Because it was literally like I was just immune to it or something. I wasn’t sad about it or angry. I knew I was loved but just wasn’t feeling it. Hmm... I really don’t know how to describe it. Anyway, it is not like that anymore and I am SOOOO happy! These moments are happening more often and also are becoming stronger! And I know everything is as it should be at this time.

It is really funny to me now because as I was growing up my Dad ALWAYS used to tell me over and over again “Lauren, you always hear but you never listen.” Also “ You look but you don’t see.” I guess I finally understand haha!