what in the world?

Can someone please tell me why I do this? It's a block I believe.....but I am frustrated. Every time I finally take a step in the direction that FEELS right and is towards what my soul wants.... at least what I feel is right..I'm joyful, happy...I HURT myself. I physically hurt myself! I just entered myself on a live chat company helping spiritually with parents and children;...doing angel card readings, messages, etc etc......and I was so happy just feeling really good......and BAM I fell just fell right on my knees STRAIGHT........out of the blue! Please please......my beloved family......if this is a block please clear it for me......or tell me how to........I am ready to release it....I want to move forward and I want the block GONE. If it isn't a block........then HEY, what the HECK is it?! LOL

ok....anyway.......any thoughts and comments is much appreciated. Love love love