LOVE!! What a great subject! Yes, I will share my thoughts on Love! I will also share with you my perspective in all the ways it can flow through the words to any that read them.

I was once "In Love" and I was the only One there! I now understand why! Love is not a thing! Love is not a box! Love does not imprison. But if it becomes or feels like a box or prison, it is because that is what it has become! The question could be then, was it love in the first place? Was it just an energy of attraction that pulls two or more people together? What is left after the ‘love’ or ‘attraction’ energy dies? That is a question for each to answer. So what was it? Was it really Love, and an experience of a facsimile? Can some energy feel like love, but not be love?

I see Love like a Flower! When it can stand on its own, even when there is no other flower around, it is still beautiful! Like a flower, love does not have to Be with another flower to Be ALL it can Be. But who can deny the beauty of 2 different colored flowers that come together in the same vase? Not Me! Have you ever noticed how some flowers have a staying power and a life energy that just remains strong when other flowers wilt and die!

I believe this is also true for both men and women in a relationship, or maybe it is just an experience with another person. Some people can continue to be in an experience with another person, even when there is no love. With statements like: "Hey it beats living alone!" or any other statement that suggests there is no Loving energy connection any longer felt within.

For Me, well I learned in my long term experience, I can not depend on another's love to satisfy Me, so I hold an Energy of Love within My Self, that satisfy's my desire to experience Love! I become Love! I AM the Energy of Love! I see my Self as Love! I view My Love like the Sun, or the Everready battery, it just keeps going and going and going!

I came to understand a number of years ago that the only Love I can truly depend on Being there for Me in "Every Moment of Now", is my own! This way, no person, no energy of the universe can take from Me what I give My Self! I become the fountain ever flowing! The sun that never goes out!

Yet.......I will NEVER give my Love to another as a gift and then watch another abuse it, or take advantage of it, or expect it to Be forever, ever again. If the Gift of Love I offer another, becomes an obligation, or they depend on it for a balance in their life, I lose the balance in my life. My Energy of Love will begin to lose its luster and sparkle and will die just a little everyday, and potentially totally disappear. Just as I first offer it as a Gift, so it is I can choose to no longer give the "Gift" to another! A written contractual marriage agreement does not care about the heart, only the obligation according to the written and spoken words in a previous moment, like a business agreement.

Marriage for Me is a contract and an institution created on paper and argued in the courts. Like any "Institution" it has boundaries and rules to live by that hold both obligation and expectations! The words of the standard marriage vows say, "Do you take this Person to Be Your Lawfully Wedded Spouce!" "I DO!" "I DO?" Love cannot be contracted in a written paper agreement or a verbal Doing Statement! How many relationships are based on love become a doing experience instead of a being experience?

Love is like the flower’s beauty for the eyes and the flower’s fragrance for the nose, the nectar of the flower is experienced in the heart! Even for the Bee, the color can attract and the fragance can invite, but it is the nectar that keeps the Bee coming back for more and more and more!

It is the nectar one feels in their heartspace when you wake up in the morning next to a person, who is a special flower in your life and you say......"The Nectar of this Friendship is So Sweet"! "I Choose to Be a Friend within this Friendship! Why? Because you don't have to Do anything to sustain it! IT is a nectar that is Co-Created by two people who are pollenating each other daily in many different ways, not just one!

Some say marriage is work! I can attest to that for sure, when it does not work, it isi work! I used to go to work for 8+ hours and then come home and work another 4-6 hours to keep a marriage together that was not paying any real dividends and the benefits were pretty minimal. But I did it for as long as I could or was able too, so I could be in the lives of my 2 very special children, whom I Love and Accept Unconditionally!

For Me, it is about Friendship!! For Me it is about Friendships! Different types of Friendships! Sometimes it can Be a Friendship with special benefits!! How Sweet the Nectar! But if the Nectar is not there for those type of special benefits, I can still Be Love! I can still Be Me, without expectations of another to give me something that I "Need", because I have already given it to MY Self.

What have I given My Self? Unconditional Acceptance! Ever Present Tolerance! Never Ending Appreciation! I never beat My Self up! I never criticize My Self. I never regret My choices. I never get angry with My Self. I don't have an expectation of My Self to Be who I AM Not! I don't make mistakes! I make choices that sometimes turn out to Be more wonderful than I ever could have imagined was possible. Other times I make choices that fall far short of what I desired to come from that choice! Sometimes I have recognized an invading energy within me choose for Me, I am aware when that happens to Me! But I learn from each choice and I look for the value in each choice.

So I accept everything! Life is about choices! If I unconditionally accept My Own Choices, I would be a fraud if I didn't also accept another's choices also! I believe it is of value to at least grant them the opportunity and freedom to choose for their Self. Another's choices will tell me a lot about who they are as I observe them. When another's choices takes Me into account too, I KNOW in My Heart they value Me as a Friend! But when anothers' choices take only Me into account and they ignore their own Self value, then it is time to look at what is really taking place. Because I then know it is not about Love, but it is about some "Need"! Many different types of "Needs" unfulfilled, or not recognized.

I can't and I won't give to another, what they will not give to their Self. I will encourage another in all the many ways I may feel in each moment is appropriate. If they won't give something to their Self, then why would they expect it from Me!!! From My perspective that is a "No Win" situation for both friends. When One person becomes more important than the other in a friendship, I believe it is time to look closely at the friendship/relationship. I have heard it before…..”I Need You.” In that thought is an imbalance. When does the desire to give to another that fills a need for them, become an obligation? At what point does another’s unstated expectations result in disappointment?

For Me. Love is a Gift without strings, expectations, a contract or obligation! Love Is a Choice!!! I choose to Give the Gift of Love to another, to every other who desire to receive it! I can't give it the same to everyone, for each person is in a different place to receive it. When I AM verbally criticized, verbally abused, verbally reprimanded, I can then choose to take back My Gift of Love! I pull My energy back and I then choose whom I offer it too! After all it is a "Gift", not an obligation!

For Me, Love is about saying to another. "If this is not the place you choose to BE, here by My Side then you are free to go!" If I ask another to Be True to Me, then I AM asking them to deny their Self. Only I won't do that, I can't do it. If a person is not interested in Being My Friend or in My Life, then I know it is not about Me, it is about them. I would rather be rejected by a person, then to have them reject or ignore their Self.

For ME it is about FREEDOM! I actually will give another person a greater freedom to choose than I will ask for or demand for My Self. Why? Because I am content to be me and I fill me up with the gift of love and unconditional acceptance I gift my Self. I can't make another happy, and I do not ask them to attempt to make me happy. Happiness and Love is something that is realized within and shared with others! How is it shared? In the Middle-Ground"! Where compromise is not work, but an expression of Friendship experienced as a Heartfelt Connection! Where the outcome or the experience is not as important as the Friendship with that special flower in My life! Maybe it is my daughter, my son, my parents, my brother or a woman or a man! It just doesn't matter to Me!

Is a physical attraction really Love? Or is it just an undeniable energy connection with another, which is so difficult to ignore, that the energy chooses that person for you, before you even know them?

I believe "True Love" is created from Nothing!! Where friendship is created from conversation, perspectives shared, an alignment of thought, where intrigue, curiousity, and a desire to get to know a person better, deeper and more completely tugs at the "Total Self". Where the scent of that flower keeps you coming back for more and more nectar! Why? BEcause the Nectar encourages your desire to Expand Within Your Self!!

Love? Love is a Gift! If You are Love! Then share the Gift of Self, without ever giving your Self away. Love is sharing Your Self, with another because You desire too! Sharing Your energy with another!! Knowing it is not an obligation, but a "Choice"!! A choice that is appreciated not expected, or an obligation!

Just Me
Love (Rick)!!!