I have been making such progress spiritually. I had lots of money issues in the past and have been working with a theta healer for the past 2 years to clear those limiting beliefs and reached a place in my life where I was doing so great financially.I have an in-home daycare and used to really have trouble keeping clients that paid and I would freak out and struggle when I lost a client and be terrified I'd never fill the spot.After using my theta healer that all changed.I began to trust that the universe would send me great dependable clients and suddenly I was filled with them. Life was great,all my needs were met,I had money left over for fun things like clothes and we were saving for a vacation.I did lose a client once after working with my healer but was surprised when I was filled with trust that I would fill the spot and I did, like magic!
For the past 2 years since working with my theta healer my income has increased and been stable and dependable. I was so confident my days of worrying about money were over and I was really beginning to enjoy life.I had a sense that all my needs would be met. Then out of the blue one of my longtime clients enrolled her child in preschool and gave me a 2 months notice.Ok I was a bit alarmed but no biggy. I then had another longtime client give me a 2 week notice and move her child somewhere else more convienient to her job. I was crushed but shook it off and moved on. I had just accepted the loss when just today another very special client of 3 years also gave me a notice. This client has been soul searching and is quitting her job in a month and wants to spend some time as a stay at home mom before her child starts school. I totally understand that and have no hard feelings as this child's mom and I are good friends and she is still going to be in my life.
3 clients lost and now im really beginning to worry. Im reading all the articles about how all our baggage and who we are not is being stripped away.Im questioning if I will be able to refill those daycare spots or if the universe will refuse to allow me to fill them. Maybe the universe is trying to strip my whole job as a daycare provider away because its not right for me anymore. I have no idea what else I can do to earn money.Daycare is all I know and all I have ever done. As stressful as my job sometimes is this is the only way I can see myself earning money. I refuse to work outside my home. Been there tried that and my soul pushed me to be my own boss. After 15 years of frustration in my daycare, Ups and downs,losing clients and refilling them, days of questioning my sanity dealing with crying babies and unrully toddlers with feelings of dread each day as the kids arrived, I had finally reached a place of love and trust in my daycare. I had the most wonderful kids and parents and felt truly blessed.
I will admitt that I do it for the money and always have, but this past year my heart has really opened to the kids and I have gotten so attached to them and look forward to seeing them each day. To open my heart only to have it crushed by their parents pulling them out of my care so abruptly is so painful. On top of that pain the confusion as to why this is happening now and,if I will be able to fill those spots and what message is in it for me is mind boggling! Everything happens for a reason and I want to know where to go from here. I want to trust that those spots will be filled and life will go back to being comfortable again.I feel like I want to ask the universe if It is going to allow me to fill those spots, as if I have to ask permission?. I am filled with more light now and deep inside my heart there is peace there and I feel like all will be fine but my ego won't allow me to trust. It wants to question this experience as if the rules have changed.
I have lost clients before and always filled the spots and have no reason to think I won't fill them now, but something feels different this time, like the old rules don't apply and it scares me.Can someone help me understand why I feel this way?