Is this Lightworker work?

Is this stuff that a Light Worker does?

A dear friend contacted me and really made me ponder this question and ask more.
They wanted to know if lightworkers cause harm to themselves. Things like thinking of suicide, cutting themselves, drinking excessively, depression, etc.

I believe the answer is yes, to all of these, and it varies from person to person.
We are all on an excellerated journey, now. Some of us have only heard the call, recently. Some have heard the call all their lives, but were prevented from moving forward until now. Can we be expected to quit all of our self defeating behaviors overnight? Perhap yes, for some, no for others. Everything comes in its perfect time and place.

Before these feelings can change, the feelings of worthlessness, of depression, of inadequacy, of not deserving to have such love and power, I think we have to recognize and accept that we created all of this in our lives and that it no longer serves us.

Do lightworkers do these kinds of things? 
You bet and then some!

How do I know?
Through all the awful and horible life lessons that have been a part of my learning experiences since my first incarnation, this life in particular. Experiences that have brought me to the point where I can understand this much about you and where you want to be and love you for it.

I know of someone I believe is a sleeping lightworker, even though they molested me when I was a child. Since that time, they have been abusive, angry, alcoholic, even suicidal at times, and causing harm to themselves. I believe that this being is a lightworker, that has not yet awakened and once awoken will be very powerful. They were stopped dead in their tracks, at 8 years old when they were molested, and never forgave themselves or anyone else.
He never told a soul, but I knew. His own mother did not believe what I said, but I still knew. Don't ask how I knew, but I knew as I grew up that this had happened to him, and then to me. He finally told, after his molester died, over 30 years later, which opened the block to the light.
This same person began hearing voices about 3 years ago, telling him it was time to get up, time to do things. He thought he was going crazy and didn't want to harm anyone, so he went to a Dr. and got pills. He is now labeled as schizophrenic. I do not believe that he is schizophrenic, just that he is beginning to open up, and is not sure what to make of it, he is so rational. I think he will make it, but he will do it on his own, as he has always done and it will be painful to own and release all of the feelings he holds onto, so that he can shine as was intended.

I know another sleeping lightworker who has not yet fully awakened, that spent 10 years doing crack, stealing from family to feed his habit, etc. He took a very bumpy road, but has made it out of the forest and is choosing his next steps. He accepts all that he has done and shines brighter every day.

My first spiritual teacher, was a wonderful caring lightworker healer. He had traveled so far, but he felt so disatisfied, as he could never stop himself from wanting to watch porn. He gave so much to the world, but he felt bad because "watching porn" was not part of "the path". So, was he a lightworker? You bet! He spread so much light everywhere he was, and cared so deeply about helping others. He just wasn't ready to let that one thing go. So what. Even though he has passed, I feel he helps me on my own path, even now. Lightworker? Yes!

I myself, spent most of my life tormented and depressed by my perceived failure as a human being. I knew I had gifts, was intellectually gifted, was brilliant with mechanical things, had wonderful intuition, I loved people and loved helping people. Still, how could I help others when I was so screwed up? I was determined not to make the mistake of being the shrink that needed a shrink. I wanted to be "fixed" before I worked to help others. I felt completely lost, unworthy, and unloveable, with no direction except "what is my next step". I have asked that repeatedly since I was 24, after I connected all the dots and saw that I was being LED in my path. I still drink too much, at times, and do not eat the healthiest of diets. Still, this is improving and I KNOW I am on my path, my highest path and purpose, the reason I am here. I don't have all the answers yet, but they will come, and I am blessed every day. As I am ready, I will let these things go. There is more learning to do, before this happens. Everything in its perfect time and place. More about me later.

I believe that there are many lightworkers out there, that are still caught in the shadows, that cannot see their own light and have NO hope for a better life. I applaud anyone who has gone through the dark night of the soul and come into the light, even if they still engage with the dark some, even if they are still not ready to release everything that no longer serves them. Everything in its perfect time and place.

Whatever you are doing is the RIGHT thing for YOU, at this moment. 
You are every bit as valuable and loveable as the angels and guides that help us, or the best of the best of the lightworkers you meet. You are divine. You are God/Spirit/Source. You are Love. We are all connected and a part of this infinite loving energy.

So, what do I say to my dear friend who asked me this question?
Yes, lightworkers do this and worse. We all have different paths and everything serves us, or did at one time. 

How do we move forward? 
Just keep your eye and heart on where you want to be, become happy where you are, keep asking for help and guidance, and when you are ready, things will change. Look for the guidance. It comes in mysterious and unexpected ways. I love you beautiful Dear One. We all love you. Keep shining brighter and brighter.

Love and Peace,
Erin