Depression in Life is A Mask -My Personal Story

DEPRESSION IN LIFE IS A MASK

I am writing this blog at the moment because I am finding so many who are struggling with this limiting condition called depression.
All who know me here as a Spiritual Teacher and do not realize where I have come from,it may help others ,this is my hope.
I will try reach the important parts as this is a very long story which when finished will be in a Book I am writing in a very different way.
I grew up with a lot of Hate & Fear,Anger from an abusive childhood which kept my Health always in a negative frame.
As I got older the patterns kept coming such as more abuse in many different ways also causing deep depression and wondering why I was born & why Me? I just kept shoving all these nasty feeling further down burying them in my cells so I thought I could escape from them instead of dealing with them,tranquilizers numbed me a bit but never completely, so I just got sicker & sicker Physically,emotionally & Spiritually.
I say spiritually because I have always have been connected to my Angels & Guides from a very early age but was always told it was just a fantasy world that wasn't real so because of this I never thought of asking for help from them,for one I never felt worthy of having them around me in the first place, silly me.
I crossed over as In death through my many illnesses and found myself wondering why I was struggling on this earthplane when it was so peaceful on the other side, the only thing that stopped me was a gentle voice telling me that I had a very important mission in this life to help a lot of other people,huh,how could this be true, the mess I was in helping others I just laughed out loud at this message, confusing me more & more.
I withdrew more & more into selfpity and never enjoying my own company until I received a message on one of my days without my medication which I found blocked spiritual messages from coming through, I was told learn how to heal yourself my child ,you have the power & our help if only you will listen .
Of course I didn't understand what I was being told & proceeded as normal ,(depressed)but what came next was amazing ,I saw workshops advertisements in magazines,over the radio ,everywhere I looked, it was haunting me to self Heal so I thought what can I lose? I was sick & tired of hating being here and being forever ill in one form or another.
It didn't take long to feel even worse discovering that everything that had happened to me was what I had created ,boy that one threw me for a loop big time, but being very defiant in nature I was about to go on a journey of self healing not really believing yet that it was true to find that under my misery in depression was many layers I had to deal with up front and very personal exposing myself in front of others was a real hard thing to do.
With each workshop I attended the layers started to peel off ,hate was the biggest as I felt why shouldn't I hate people who had abused me and hurt me deeply.
My Angels were getting very excited with each discovery and the messages were coming louder & clearer,no longer was I shutting them out and they made me understand that I was punishing myself for what they were doing to me by allowing it to continue.
How crazy are we to give ourselves a life sentence of misery from what others had done?
Probably because deep down I knew I had allowed it all so it was me ,the first one I had to forgive,for all my past mistakes in this life & every other lifetime I have ever lived .
I even met my true love soulmate by divine intervention but now that is another story on how that happened & may write another blog on that alone.lol.
I was starting to find the real me which was supported by my Husband ,finally someone loved me for ME,just Me,and all that came with me,wow,this gave me more determination to keep going on this Healing Journey,things of a good nature was starting to happen FINALLY.
The layers underneath were coming to the front fast & furious and I had to start forgiving every single person in my 46 years of living,wow ,what a job this was,I couldn't forget or accept what they had done but I knew I had to let Go & let God in each situation knowing universal karma would take good care of them.
I started forgiving from my Heart and realizing I had played a big part in everything for what MST be a good reason which I now know what the earlier message meant by helping others to self heal too.
Then I found out that I had the early signs of Alzheimer Disease showing in my eyes and learning through my course which was Spiritual Iridology meant that I was denying my divine Intelligence,this was another wow,all the time I had been told that all the spiritual stuff was unreal & I believed them,grrr.
So this made me even more defiant ,I had been a Hairdresser for 30 years and now I knew where my journey was leading me, yes, straight back to Spirituality as my life,career,passion,happiness,good health and best of all divine at-oneness.
It has taken me a long time to know where I belong but time & age matters not when life is BLiss.
It needn't take so long if we are supported & guided in the moment we are ready to be.
Since then Brandon Bays has gifted us with a most incredible modality which does what I did in years to aprox 4 hours of gentle peeling all the layers off & forgiving without accepting or condoning the actions of ourselves or others & setting ourselves free from total forgiveness from the Heart.

This Book is ,for those who do not know of it is called THE JOURNEY BY BRANDON BAYS & if you read that book you will know what i mean and yo will need to find a gentle Facilitator to do it with (HIGHLY RECOMMENDED).
I have seen miraculous results from this Journey which I now do regularly .
There is no good anyone telling you not to feel what yo are feeling,you have to embrace everything you feel before you can release it .
My whole purpose of this is to hopefully help any that are seeking so I pray that it does,
I wish you Love,Light ,Peace ,Happiness & Laughter which I now feel ,
I AM ALL THAT I AM
Rosalie xo