Loss, there are many ways to lose someone

Loss, there are many ways we lose someone. There is physical loss, the knowing that our someone is no longer around us, knowing that there is a great distance between us and them, whether it be in this dimension or another. Physical loss is noticed first by our senses, we cannot see the person, hear them, feel them, smell their perfume...they are just not there in our reality as we have been used to them being.Physical loss is felt quite acutely, especially when surrounded by objects belonging to our someone. They provide constant reminders as to our loss. This is severing of a physical connection, the necessity to readjust our being to the loss of someone of meaning from our lives. This is a momentous readjustment to our own physical being.

Secondly, emotional loss. When we lose someone of great emotional meaning from our lives, we experience a range of complex emotions and feelings. Loss in itself is not restricted to a person passing, but simply moving out of your life when you still wish them to be there. Much pain and hurt can be experienced, and in a very intense manner. We begin to question why, wonder where we went wrong, wonder how things could be different...all the what if's. At times we harbour feelings of guilt, whether these be unrealistic given the circumstances or whether they seem realistic to each individual, really makes no difference to the emotional turmoil experienced. Every emotion arising from a loss is felt with much depth and each individual manges each emotion differently form another. There are times we feel great anger, times we blame either ourselves or the person who has left us, times we question who and what we are.

Another type of loss is spiritual. Sometimes it takes a personal loss to make us question our beliefs, our I AM presence, and we wonder why we have to go through such a painful experience. It is not unusual , at a time of loss, to seek solace in spirituality, try to discover the answers that dwell within. We look for some direction, something to grasp onto and often spirituality in one form or another provides that anchor. However, a loss can also trigger doubt and questions regarding the fairness of life, the fairness of God and sway our trust in our beliefs and ourselves.

Whilst loss is often the trigger for furthering the spiritual part of ourselves, it can also provide a stop sign for growth in the short term. Therefore, not only do we lose someone we care for , but also faith in our longstanding belief systems. During times of loss, we experience a whole range of physical, emotional and spiritual issues. These experiences shape the path that we follow and influence where we head in future. As difficult as these times maybe, without them, would we really be the people we are today? Would we be on the path we are now on? Would we have learnt that great strength does come from within when needed? I think not, I think what we eperience truly shapes not only the path we chose to take, but also the qualities and inner beauty that we all have. I believe without the experience of loss we cannot experience the true value of life.

©2008 J Picken